I'm not one to boast, but I need to mention that yesterday my team won the Annual Extramural Indoor Soccer Tournament @ Humber College. It's my third year playing in it, and finally we won. I think I need to mention this because since coming to UTSC I haven't won a single soccer championship, with exception to winning the league in interhouse twice. I scored a hat trick in the final match, but I must admit that I had used a chemical enhancement. Before the game, they were giving away the left over drinks from lunchtime. They ran out of orange, so I decided to try the other drink, which Meghan, my prez, said was "Blue Raspberry." I hate raspberries. It was only when I took my first sip of this concoction that I realised Blue Raspberry is another term for Blue Freezie Flavour!!! I had like two glasses of it, which would be the equivalent sugar rush of about 2 Jumbo Kisko Kid freezies. So you can imagine that I was on fire that match, or more correctly, on ice! (bad joke) Seriously, I definitely had the sugars running through me, after the game my buddy Sadaf was like "Great Game" and I was just kinda standing there, shaking, not knowing what to say. I regularly don't take compliments well anyway, but I blame this time on the sugar. My toe is for sure fractured, it's not looking any better after that tourney. Some pussy stepped and rested on my broken toe too after a game cuz he lost. Hailey (sp.) and I just laughed about it and decided to win just to spite him. But that's nothing compared to what happend to my keeper Sibtain. The guy suffered a concussion, passed out and had to be taken to the hospital! But we won the cup for him. Or rather, the chairs, which half of us exchanged for hats, and I exchanged for the other UTSC team's Fair Play shirt.
Okay seriously, I just gotta ask, is my lisp becoming more pronounced, or do people simply not listen to a single word I say anymore? Everyone's misinterpreting what I've said, or misquoting me, or not getting the point of what I'm saying, and so on. Like really I think I need to talk less; one word answers are more direct and harder to miscommunicate.
My marketing project is over, I'm so relieved. I was actually looking forward to this day, even tho this day marks the beginning of studying for finals. That project went down to the wire, we officially finished the last step @ like 4:59pm on Thursday. Class was at 5. But it was well done, and the prof gave us praise on the presentation. We had good times to, lots of laughs along the way, including Qahir's simple yet constantly funny saying, "What da fuck!" Something weird I found out, I always pick one side of a room during a presentation and focus on it. I have to make a conscious effort to remember that I haven't looked on the other side of the room in order to turn, it's weird, I gotta correct that.
One last thing. I'm getting a lot of that, "This is my world, and you're just living in it" attitude. Like really, What da Fuck! haha. That's it i guess, I'm in a pissy mood. Everyone pisses me off right now, but nobody for the same reason, so I'm forced to believe that it has at least something to do with my own personal baggage. Unless of course, I live in a world of ignorance where only I have the power to see the light. You never really know. But for those of you with that "this is my world..." attitude, who think that they are that sole person who sees the light, remind me to slap you in the face next time and remind you that you're wrong.
Pissy Comment of The Day: "Canadian born Chinese bash the black and brown identity, because they have no identity of their own."
Saturday, November 27, 2004
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
It's getting chilly.
This is where I would regularly compensate for my previous romantically-involved post. Typically, I would write an angry post, or worse yet a funny one. Why? So as to vainly cover my image, in hopes that people won’t think that I’m too sensitive. Why? Because nobody likes a sensitive guy. Girls actually don’t, it was all a lie. And obviously given the choice, my boys would prefer the more rugged outdoorsy Jamil, rather then the sensitive family sedan model.
I’m far less concerned with my image then before. I’ve come to realise that people basically size you up in and around the first three conversations they have with you, and typically they'll remember the things that reinforce their presumptions and ignore the rest. So why work on one’s image, I say? It’s a self-defeating conquest.
Furthermore, I’m far less sensitive then before. So I guess I just have less to hide. I’m more or less unphased by the irregular dating habits and general preferences of hot chicks. Previously topics such as these caused me high levels of dissonance. Personal frustrations are also lessening. Given the options of more sleep or wakeful self-loathing, I now choose the former, only because sleep feels so good. In a sense, sleep is kind of like that ‘instant-gratification’ people seek to combat negative and hurtful feelings. Sleep, in other words, is my cigarette. Actually that’s a lie. Milkshakes are now my cigarette. The TD at Warden Woods is right beside a Baskin Robbins, and the lady there lets me make my own concoctions of milkshakes, any flavours, it’s nuts!
So am I solidifying into a noble and righteous man, or am I regressing further still into a pit of insecurity? I don’t know if I’m a valid judge of myself, but I don’t think it’s either case really. I’m more inclined to believe that I’m simply busy trying to get shit done. Soon December will come and I will sleep and go to work and eat, and then have ample time to revisit the question of “where I’m at” in life.
As of right now, the answer to that question is "by myself." As I think I've noted in a post last year, most people start jonesing for love around springtime. Wintertime is my peak. Romantic prospects however are minimal. Other then at work, I haven’t really met a single new person since September, let alone a lady, let alone a nice one…let alone a looker. I’ve been so busy that if this were a month ago and I had met someone who was interested in me I probably would have passed on her. In a month from now however, if history is any indication, desperation will be looming. Desperate or not, I don't even think there will be anyone there when I'm in need. Ho hum. At least there will be Fox Sports World and The Movie Network to pass the time.
I’m far less concerned with my image then before. I’ve come to realise that people basically size you up in and around the first three conversations they have with you, and typically they'll remember the things that reinforce their presumptions and ignore the rest. So why work on one’s image, I say? It’s a self-defeating conquest.
Furthermore, I’m far less sensitive then before. So I guess I just have less to hide. I’m more or less unphased by the irregular dating habits and general preferences of hot chicks. Previously topics such as these caused me high levels of dissonance. Personal frustrations are also lessening. Given the options of more sleep or wakeful self-loathing, I now choose the former, only because sleep feels so good. In a sense, sleep is kind of like that ‘instant-gratification’ people seek to combat negative and hurtful feelings. Sleep, in other words, is my cigarette. Actually that’s a lie. Milkshakes are now my cigarette. The TD at Warden Woods is right beside a Baskin Robbins, and the lady there lets me make my own concoctions of milkshakes, any flavours, it’s nuts!
So am I solidifying into a noble and righteous man, or am I regressing further still into a pit of insecurity? I don’t know if I’m a valid judge of myself, but I don’t think it’s either case really. I’m more inclined to believe that I’m simply busy trying to get shit done. Soon December will come and I will sleep and go to work and eat, and then have ample time to revisit the question of “where I’m at” in life.
As of right now, the answer to that question is "by myself." As I think I've noted in a post last year, most people start jonesing for love around springtime. Wintertime is my peak. Romantic prospects however are minimal. Other then at work, I haven’t really met a single new person since September, let alone a lady, let alone a nice one…let alone a looker. I’ve been so busy that if this were a month ago and I had met someone who was interested in me I probably would have passed on her. In a month from now however, if history is any indication, desperation will be looming. Desperate or not, I don't even think there will be anyone there when I'm in need. Ho hum. At least there will be Fox Sports World and The Movie Network to pass the time.
Friday, November 12, 2004
Hope you like it
I don't quite remember where I first met her.
Part of me remembers a field of tall grass. As I sorted through it, finding not much more then myself, I came upon her image. The sun shone softly against her face, as her hair translated the breeze. She wore a sort of checkered-plaid blouse, in shades of red and white, tied up by the wayside. It was a warm summer’s afternoon which grew warmer as she drew nearer. We encountered one another for what seemed to be the hundredth time, as if to say it was all planned. Surely, not by us. As the tall grass grew taller still around us we lost ourselves in the field, sometime around high noon. We spent seven eternities together until finally the sun had set on our romance. The rest is unclear to me.
Part of me still yet remembers walking along the slender paved pathway which traversed a park, cutting beneath the autumn trees. We had arranged to meet here after finding out that we both had fond childhood memories in this park. There was a subtle yet distinct chill in the air. We realized neither of us was appropriately dressed for the occasion. I offered my sweater all the same, it was only proper. My comfort was a love unlike any I had had before. We conversed to pass the time. Our words wrote a timeless ballad of mutual understanding and romantic potential. We gently yet efficiently peeled away at each other’s emotional layers only to find that we shared the same core. I halted, startled by this revelation, then proceeded once more. We proceeded onwards across the pathway, and into each other’s future.
What I do remember is the following. I meant to say it to her that day, but I was too encaptured by her to find the words. "The day we met, the man I used to be accepted his fate, and acknowledged you as my life's epoch."
-Don't you miss those creative writing assignments? Back to homework!
Part of me remembers a field of tall grass. As I sorted through it, finding not much more then myself, I came upon her image. The sun shone softly against her face, as her hair translated the breeze. She wore a sort of checkered-plaid blouse, in shades of red and white, tied up by the wayside. It was a warm summer’s afternoon which grew warmer as she drew nearer. We encountered one another for what seemed to be the hundredth time, as if to say it was all planned. Surely, not by us. As the tall grass grew taller still around us we lost ourselves in the field, sometime around high noon. We spent seven eternities together until finally the sun had set on our romance. The rest is unclear to me.
Part of me still yet remembers walking along the slender paved pathway which traversed a park, cutting beneath the autumn trees. We had arranged to meet here after finding out that we both had fond childhood memories in this park. There was a subtle yet distinct chill in the air. We realized neither of us was appropriately dressed for the occasion. I offered my sweater all the same, it was only proper. My comfort was a love unlike any I had had before. We conversed to pass the time. Our words wrote a timeless ballad of mutual understanding and romantic potential. We gently yet efficiently peeled away at each other’s emotional layers only to find that we shared the same core. I halted, startled by this revelation, then proceeded once more. We proceeded onwards across the pathway, and into each other’s future.
What I do remember is the following. I meant to say it to her that day, but I was too encaptured by her to find the words. "The day we met, the man I used to be accepted his fate, and acknowledged you as my life's epoch."
-Don't you miss those creative writing assignments? Back to homework!
Thursday, November 04, 2004
I don't like my last blog now, it's not doin' it for me
"As the master and creator of philosophy, it is my duty during every argument to challenge my own position. For if I fail to do so, nobody will challenge my challenge." c2004
Come to think of it, is that taken? If not, c2004
Come to think of it, is that taken? If not, c2004
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)