My World

It has always been so
Algorithms
They have always decided our fate
Specifically from day one

The narrative is embedded in our very being

History

What I've had was
Some who honestly felt they could
Fulfill themselves through me
Many more who knew they couldn't

But love, I mean unless that's all there is to it

Stay the Night

Hard to hear this wind and
Not listen to us
Fall apart, a million pieces
Will you stay the night at least

Help clean come morning

Gust

It's the same weather
As the last time
You ran away
Ran away with this terrible wind

To reveal a new blue sky

Comfortable

You took
My life's savings
Spent every last dime
Now that we're both broke you ask

To borrow my shoes to walk away

Excitement

Excitement isn't joy
It's as much pain as it is pleasure
There is such a thing as too much of it
Excitement is the absence of joy

With the knowledge of it

Irrational

Excitement or impatience
Has it been too long
Or is it too soon
I can't know without your permission

I'm willing to guess even without

Darkness My Friend

You win
Take over my heart and body
Make the worst choices
Just send me the bill

I can't bother to keep my life together

Suspect Line

Not a racist
This is not your right
You have many rights but this is not one
You stand accused because a crime is committed

It's only on me to decide if you fit the description

Handouts

A moment in Nirvana
I'm not ashamed to say it
I'd use you in a heartbeat for that
If a moment is all you'll give me

I'll use it to bear a lifetime without you

The Butterfly Tree

The beginning was very romantic
Sprung forth from my cocoon et cetera
Those high flying days are behind us
I don't do well encased in your desire

Withering the very wings that brought me here

Black Cop

Believe me, I know judgment
First my skin and now my shirt too
You scream that I chose the wrong side
Scrambling yourself from oppressed to oppressor

While I'm sentenced each day to face your worst

Victoria and Abdul

I know now the difference
Between power and freedom
What delightful irony
It taking this most meager servant

To liberate a queen

Redoubtable

When and where
Can the revolution safely retire
Do ideals ever keep up with change
Am I a martyr without cause

Or a cliché without effect

The Hungry

It's strictly business
Life, love, dreams, ambition
It all boils down to planning and execution
Strategy, the very lifeblood of success

And what is life but success in not dying

Beneath Your Clothes

We weren't dating anymore
You made that clear in my dream
Undressing in front of me with a cross face
The pain of you not wanting me was outweighed

Only by the pain of knowing you felt unsafe in my affection

Mother!

More than a vessel
I didn't simply bring you into the world
I created you from nothing, from all of me
Yet you yearn for their affections over my love

I have housed you but will not house your betrayal

Part-Time

I'd rather have this conversation
Laying down
Vulnerable and protecting you
What you're saying would make more sense

If being your man was more than a part-time gig

Want

It wasn't his mother's fault she had reason enough
Raising a child of her own womb
To want for nothing
Now he wants for nothing

Least of all me, a prize too easily won over

Loving Pablo

I'll either forever regret
Or forever rejoice this day
In any case you are my everything now
You were hungry enough to swallow me whole

The poor have no time for simply tasting

Casing

We have no unfinished business
He has nothing to give me back
He didn't take my heart
Just broke it and left it for me

In any case he was just trying to free it from casing 

Spectator

Sick, breathless, crying
My body's convinced it needs to expel you
My mind thinks otherwise
Which leaves me a spectator to their conflict

My eyes are glued until the final whistle

Hope

They don't pray
All they do is bow their heads
When they really want something
They pray with sweat and tears

Cry out to god praying the sacrifice was worth it

Sammy Davis Jr: I Gotta Be Me

I didn't get to decide
How I came or how I went
But your first and last impression of me
I'm gonna own those baby

Everything in the middle I was just renting

Novitiate

Why can't I hear you
The way they do
Am I in love with your mystery
And the loneliness I tried to escape

Chasing your light into this darkness

Killing of the Sacred Deer

Which ideals and deep loves
Would you part with
Not for gain, but survival
Does it take courage or rather cowardice

To choose a life and see it through

Contrast

I've come to see
How it happens again and again
I envy and perhaps love you so much
That I appeal to your ignorance

Contrasting myself and your perception of me

No comma

We were noisy
Loud music we felt
In the end were were commotion
Begging for quiet

Commas, until period

Intervals

Today I can see the sun knowing
How long I waited and how soon she'll leave
I don't need to disguise sadness
With contentment

Grieving all my heart out has made room for today

Never Steady, Never Still

I'm still here
Inside myself
A volcano overflowing
In ways I fear you'll never see

Erupting in ways I fear you will

Stronger

Who could want me
Broken as I am
You are a person and a half
Filling in for my missing parts

Giving you my all would be my life's blessing

Proudly Ashamed

Withholds more than it yields
Controls more than it serves
Harms more than it protects
Binds more than it liberates

Pride has done more damage than shame

See you

Wishing I could
Reach across this space between us
Give you what happiness I have left
See what you can make of it

Even if it leave me at a loss again

Forgiveness

That's not me
Is what they always say once convicted
Though we begged them
To drop the racist act

You are everything you hold on to

Man

They weren't there
In that delivery room
This is why they know death and dying
More than they know life

And die trying to create a living

Trying

There is no closure
I loved you with all my wind
Leave the door open
Don't crumble behind the weight

Of trying to forget me

Be With It

If it weren't for that bellyache
I would have forever forgot
How good healthy feels
Thanking this moment with my company

Out of gratitude

In My Religion

What did the concept
The future
Mean to our ancestors
Was it us

Is humanity moving on schedule

Cliché

Just be with the moment
Be with it
Don't control it or fear control
Just see where it takes you

Trust the moment