Wednesday, September 04, 2013

About to build my Webb

In a week if it all goes well, I will have finally moved.  There's a confluence of emotion that comes with moments like these.  The best way to deal with any confluence is to simply list:

- I've lost the feeling of "at last" with this move.  Part of me feels like it took too long, I should've been on my own in my 20s.  Part of me feels like everything is unfolding as it should.  None of me wants this to take any longer.

-Mortgage means bills.  Bills means work.  Work means sacrifice, but I will not sacrifice myself for my shelter.  I'm encased in enough sheltering as it is - I will not lose who I am.  When I say that I don't mean that I'm holding on to who I was, rather, it means I will not lose the opportunity to prove who I am.  It's time to focus on my multiple careers, there is now too much at risk not to

- I wonder where toilet paper is on sale.

- I've never been on my own.  Perhaps by doing so I will no longer want to be.  How simple I might be.

- This moment is not as momentous as it will feel.  A couple days after the move I will realize that I am still me, in a different city, not far from my old one.  I'm still not on my own.

- Friday the 13th, good omen?

- I'm looking forward to better sleeping hours.

- I'm looking forward to better waking hours.

- I need to command a new set of proficiencies. This is not a hustle, it's the rest of my life.  There's no turning back from here, there's only up or down.

- Forget curtains, and that price they can just look at me roam around naked.



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